I love a good argument but sometimes I am the worst for bottling it all up and then letting it explode out of my mouth all at once so that I say things I may regret.
Stuart on the other hand doesn’t like to walk away from an argument. He likes to get it all out there and then and have it sorted in the next breath. I genuinely think this is why we work so much. Opposites attract and all that.
Sometimes after a long ass day being able to shout and scream and then cuddle and make up can really do wonders for your sanity.
I once had a boyfriend that would NEVER argue. I used to try and wind him up something rotten (very mature I know) but it was all for nought. After him and I didn’t work out I vowed I wanted someone who could stand up for themselves and argue back to me or with me. It’s quite a running joke with my friends that I certainly got what I wished for in Stuart and more!
I never understand those couples that say “oh we never argue”. Seriously, you’re a mystery to me. Surely that isn’t healthy? I take my hats off to you though.
Here are five topics of argument that have propped up or still pop up every now and again in our household since we have became parents.
- The “working-is-harder-than-being-a-stay-at-home-parent-or-vice-versa” debate: Even writing that made my blood boil. This is one of the main arguments we used to have when I was on maternity leave and Stuart was working. I think in those early months you’re both so exhausted and you think your the most exhausted person on the planet that no other person could be as exhausted as you right now. Which is why you can’t see that your partner is feeling the exact same. We managed to come out the other end of this argument and it RARELY comes up anymore. But there are the odd occasions when we don’t think before we speak and it might get slung around.
- Who’s morning/night it is to “deal” with the baby: It’s taken us a good year and a bit to get ourselves into a routine which we are happy to call “equal” parenting. But if Ivy goes to stay at her Grandparents house and it completely throws our morning/night routines out of the window; we find ourselves back in that argument of “it’s your morning” “no its yours” “I did it last time” “NO I DID IT LAST TIME!” Even writing that I felt a bit embarrassed but we are only human and sleep deprivation brings out the worst in all of us!
- Money: is the route of all evil and the route of all family households. I don’t want for much. I just want us to be able to get by without the worrying and I’m sure Stuart would agree. But it still causes arguments. All. Of. The. Time.
- Who gets to push the pram: “I’ll push it there, you push it back.” That’s that one sorted.
- Who does the most housework: This falls into argument number one because that’s how Stuart backs up his excuses, “well I’m working.” Well I’m looking after a tiny, out of control, wild
animalhuman all day. Whilst also trying to keep myself sane. That takes a lot of energy so if something is to go slacking then I’m sorry you’re going to come home to a pile of dust for tea. But to be fair, Stuart does do a lot of cleaning around the house when he can. I did get myself a “good un'” where that is concerned.
I’m sure there are so many petty arguments I have left out but those are the main ones that crop up in our house. But that’s just it, they are petty. They are how we express our frustrations when it comes to parenting because my god if it is anything it is bloody frustrating! At the end of the day I am extremely lucky that I get to have my partner there so I can vent away to him and vice versa because I really do think it helps to keep my sanity. Sorry Stuart.
Let me know of the typical arguments that take place in your family homes in the comments down below.